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Is it just me, or do the people who bought into the whole world ending on December 21st seem a little disappointed? What are they thinking? “No offense, but I was ready to be alone in the universe.” Think of all the deep conversations you wouldn’t get to have all on your lonesome:

You hang up.

– No, you hang up.

No, you.

-Okay, bye.

I can hear you breathing.

Jersey shore December 2012

Jersey shore December 2012

I’m visiting family in New Jersey, walking around for the first time since Sandy hit almost two months ago.  My sister’s one and only goal for the year was to see the sun rise over the ocean. We like to aim low. Unfortunately, not low enough as this has yet to happen. We’ve made it to the beach with one eye open a handful of times, but these were all cloudy days that robbed us of that exact moment when the sun taints my lovely black sky. We did manage to see a real live shark cloud.

Shark Cloud

Shark Cloud

Jersey shore post-Sandy

Jersey shore post-Sandy

Jersey shore post-sandy

Jersey shore post-sandy

Jersey shore

You’re still perty, Jersey

The was a boardwalk here:

jersey shore post-sandyAnd a restaurant here:

jersey shore post-sandy

Damage to some of the small towns along the Jersey shore looks manageable compared to what we’ve seen in Staten Island and Queens, though I haven’t been much further south than Asbury Park. Still plenty of debris to be cleared, but it looks like they’re building back with more dunes to prevent erosion and flooding in the future.

Now back to me.

I get an A+++++++ for 2012 because I learned to ski – sort of. It all started with an instructor who spoke in unhelpful pizza metaphors. The hardest thing is learning to stop on the slope and how to not fly into trees or break my head. It feels like I’m the only person over the age of 4 who doesn’t already know how to ski.

In hindsight, I realize stopping is important to master before leaving the learning area for mightier peaks, but I really wanted to ride the ski lift. And I did. I rocked the ski lift. The weird thing about being an adult is that nobody really questions your ability to do something. If you jump into a pool everyone assumes you know how to swim. If you hop off the ski lift so high up that you can’t see the bottom of the mountain, everyone around assumes you have a clue how to stop.

“All you gotta do is make a pizza slice [to stop].”

With my instructor’s wise words still fresh in my head, I figured I’d be fine. The concept makes sense, but in practice I just kept going no matter how horizontal I zigged and zagged. I basically fell down the mountain upright. On the plus side I didn’t run over anybody or break any bones. Snowboarding is next because snowboarders don’t look like they’re in nearly as much pain at the end of the day.